Off-Grid Voices - A Chat With Kaitlyn Ramsay

Sharing others' experiences with living a life outside the norm

Off-Grid Voices is a series of written interviews with others who are out there living their best lives, living lives that are a little outside the norm, a little different. I’m hoping this series will inspire some of you who may be thinking about living a life off the grid, travelling the world, doing #vanlife, or anything else that you may be considering. Hope you enjoy exploring these lifestyles with me. 😊

This month we get to know Kaitlyn Ramsay, who is writing for Loving the Dark Parts and currently lives in Thailand.

Let’s start with learning a bit more about you, Kaitlyn.

I’m Kaitlyn, writer and astrologer at Loving the Dark Parts, where I write about real life through the lens of astrology. Some common topics include living abroad, sobriety, cyclical living, and relationships. I currently live in a small town in Northern Thailand, with my dog Lady, who I adopted here five years ago.

Tell us a little bit about your lifestyle. On your Substack I read you’re a Canadian expat living in Thailand. Would you mind sharing a bit about what made you move and why you chose Thailand?

It wasn’t actually my intention to move abroad long term. In 2016 after a breakup, I decided to quit my corporate job and travel on a working holiday visa to Australia. I sold my things and packed a backpack with some belongings and set out on what I thought would be a one year adventure. 

While I was living in Australia, I found myself craving a new culture—as Australia is really similar to Canada—and ended up in South East Asia. Eight years later, I’m living in a town that I had meant to be travelling to for only two days. I fell in love (with a man and the place) and never left! I was living in a dorm for about a year until I realized it was probably time for me to rent a house and secure more solid roots.

You mentioned that before you moved to Thailand you did a bit of travelling. Where have you travelled and what’s your all-time favourite travel destination?

I started travelling when I was quite young—my first trip was to St. Maarten with my dad as a child, then to the Dominican Republic and Cuba on other family trips. In high school I was fortunate enough to go on a class trip to Europe and explored parts of Italy, France, Monaco, and Vatican City. I got bit by the travel bug early in life, and little did I know that it would turn into my lifestyle as an adult.

Later in life, when I quit my job in Canada, I travelled to Australia to explore on my own. When I felt complete there, I went to Bali for a quick R&R stop to practice some yoga for a few weeks. The yoga teacher mentioned the town I’m now living in, which is wild to think about. I wrote more about it in a story of synchronicities on my personal Substack.

After leaving Bali, I travelled to Thailand, Cambodia, and Laos. And this year I went to Malaysia and Japan. The beauty of living here is that there are so many accessible countries nearby—and with local visa requirements, I’m often required to leave the country—this year I decided to make some trips out of it. 

My favourite travel destination so far has been Japan. The culture is something I’ve always been intrigued by, and the food is absolutely amazing. The care that Japanese people put into everything they do is really inspiring. I also went near cherry blossom season and it was beautiful to see.

If you had to explain your current lifestyle in a couple of words, how would you describe it? What would be the main aspects of living life your way?

My current lifestyle is simple. I don’t have many things, and I have embraced a slower pace of life. Coming from the corporate world, it was tough (and still is, at times) to trust the slow life and to learn how to push less. I’ve learned to live more cyclically, in alignment with my own natural ebbs and flows, which has been challenging and equally as rewarding. During the time I quit drinking alcohol in 2020, I started studying astrology, which guided me inward and inspired me to live more according to the seasons. My sensitivities now exposed, without the numbing of alcohol, had me restructuring my life to support the new change. I’ve become more connected to my menstrual cycle and I structure my life to support the phases of each month—by the moon and my own menstrual cycle—resting during the times I don’t have energy, and pushing harder through ovulation and near the full moon. Looking at the larger astrological cycles have been helpful for me, too, by inspiring me to give myself more grace and pointing me to the areas where I should focus my energy at any given time.

I live in a small northern town in Thailand, where it takes about 3 hours and 762 curves up and down the mountain to get to the nearest city. I have a history of moving to more isolated places, and this is no exception. The town is small and very community minded, which is something I can appreciate in the current climate of the world—we don’t all have this opportunity.

Most of my days are filled with some work online, coffee at one of my favourite cafés, and time with my dog, Lady. I live quite simply in my home—my toilets flush with a bucket of water, I just got hot water for my shower last year, and I travel to the laundromat by scooter with my laundry bag between my legs to wash my clothes and come home to hang them on the line in the sun.

I’ve taken up dance classes and practice Muay Thai some weeks. I spend some days writing and painting, and I essentially have more freedom to do what I want with the time I do have.

I’d love to learn a bit more about the benefits you have seen in your own life from adopting this type of lifestyle and moving to Thailand?

The biggest benefit of moving overseas has been experiencing how other people live. 

Sometimes we assume that everyone has similar mindsets, goals, and ways of living, but by moving abroad I’ve come to appreciate that we all value different things. The definition of success that was instilled in me from my home country never really resonated with me, and by moving abroad I came closer to who I truly am and how I define success. I’ve been able to see how others live, and adopt new ways of living that suit my own values. I care a lot less about what I have, the clothes I wear, and what I drive than ever before.

Living in a new country (especially one with a different language and culture) will test you to your limits, but the things I’ve learned about myself and the world around me is something I will always treasure. 

We all know life isn’t just about the positives, and making changes can come with challenges and frustrations as well. What would you say is your biggest challenge of your current lifestyle or moving abroad - how are you overcoming these challenges?

There are definitely many challenges that come along with my lifestyle! One of the most challenging is being far from family. It’s hard to watch my family grow and experience life without me—there are some family members that I’ve never met because I’ve been away since they’ve been born. Sometimes I feel as though I’m on the outside looking in. It can get lonely, especially around the holidays when nostalgia kicks in. Trying to recreate the holidays is something I’ve tried to do, but doing it without family around is hard.

On the more practical side of things, language barriers can be difficult—especially when it comes to basic needs. It can be hard to get practical tasks done, like buying food, setting up internet, doctor’s visits, transportation, or even finding places to stay. Charades can get you far, but it can be a pain to get your point across and to understand those around you. 

Language barriers can also be challenging when trying to build deeper connections, like friendships and romantic relationships. Communication is hard enough in intimate relationships when we speak the same first language, but to have the extra barrier can be difficult. It takes more effort to build long lasting and fulfilling connections. Sometimes I find relationships can only go so far, even though I speak, read, and write Thai, and many people here speak good English, but it’s not at the level of fluency and true flow. Acts of service go far, and food is a love language in Asian culture. I’ve learned new ways to express myself without needing to use words, and I think this is a valuable skill I will carry with me throughout the rest of my life.

My biggest challenge right now is not knowing what’s next. I have a sense that I won’t be in Thailand much longer, but I’m not sure where I will go next. I’ve grown so much here, but I’m not sure that it is my forever home. 

What advice would you give someone who is looking to move overseas / adopt this type of lifestyle?

My advice is to just do it. If it’s something that sparks your interest, it’s worth it. It can be challenging, but through the challenges you will learn so much about yourself. Try to learn a little bit about the culture and the ways of life beforehand, and be open to things being different than in your home country. Practice living in a similar way to the locals, and be respectful of the traditions and way of life for the best possible experience. Make local friends and learn the language, oftentimes the language holds much of the culture within it. Eat local food and don’t be afraid to try things you haven’t experienced before. 

I would wholeheartedly recommend it, even if it’s just for a season of your life—remember the decisions you make don’t have to be forever. I’m not sure how long I will continue to live here, but it’s helpful to know I’m not stuck in it, and I can choose to leave at any time if I’m ready for a new experience.

Thank you so much Kaitlyn for sharing your story with us. I loved learning about your journey. For anyone wanting to learn a bit more about Kaitlyn, go check out her substack. Definitely check out her story about the notebook and synchronicity, it's beautiful ❤️

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Something that inspired me this week

I’m keeping it simple this week with a reminder of one of my favourite quotes.

Sometimes we can get so worked up about things and we feel we need to have an answer to everything that comes our way. This quote reminds me that ‘not saying anything’ is a perfectly acceptable reply. I don’t have to have an opinion about everything that comes my way.

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