Why we should embrace discomfort

And do the hard things

The obstacle in the path becomes the path. Never forget, within every obstacle is an opportunity to improve our condition. - Ryan Holiday

I used to get a light form of seasonal depression every winter.

Not in a true clinical sense, but definitely enough to throw off my mood during those shorter and colder winter days. As the days shortened, I would always notice my energy levels drop. I wouldn’t have the energy to go outside and go for the long hikes that I typically do. Days mainly were spent hunkering down and wishing for summer to arrive.

I tried every solution I could think of, I even bought one of those light therapy lamps.

This winter is different.

I have energy, my mood is balanced, and while I’m definitely looking forward to summer, this winter just doesn’t seem as harsh and never-ending as it usually does.

Which is strange, because in reality this is one of the hardest winters I’ve ever experienced, since we’re missing the normal comforts that come with living an on the grid lifestyle. I’ve talked about it before: it’s been freezing cold and it feels like we’re always busy trying to fix things. Some days, I miss the ease with which we could just arrive home, turn on the heat pump and enjoy a warm home.

Some of the difficulties also come from our specific setup. We live in two tiny homes. One is the utilities house, and the other has the bedroom and office. This seemed like a bright idea at the start, but it does mean we’re constantly moving between two buildings. When it’s pouring down with rain, this can become a bit of a mission. Did I mention we have an outdoor toilet too?

After some reflection, I realised that precisely this discomfort was the reason I’ve been feeling better.

Doing hard things

When you consistently do hard things, all the other stuff seems relatively easy.

It’s why cold showers are so popular nowadays.

Our shower has been slightly malfunctioning the past two weeks, resulting in lukewarm showers and sometimes, without any warning, turning the hot water off. Surprise cold showers are not my favourite way of starting the day. But that’s beside the point.

Cold showers are a form of intentional discomfort.

In my life I’ve often had a tendency to choose the more challenging path in life. Like emigration, building our own tiny house, and living off the grid.

My husband and I often reflect that, for some reason, we appear to enjoy living life on “hard mode”. Choosing to live in a cabin in the woods without any of the comforts of modern life is our way of deliberately choosing discomfort.

In all honesty, the whole thing wasn’t deliberate - this is fully an unintended consequence. While I expected to feel better with this lifestyle, I didn’t entirely understand the mechanism before embarking on the journey.

It’s an investment

What we’re really doing by living this way and living life on “hard mode” is investing in our future resilience.

By doing the difficult things each day, without even really thinking about it, I’m teaching my brain that I can do the difficult things. It’s like a rehearsal for when life inevitably will throw another big curveball our way. It’s like going to the gym and lifting weights - you’re training your body to become stronger. In a similar vein, living this way is training my mind to become stronger.

I would love to take credit for this idea, but the Greek Stoics beat me to it. They spoke about voluntary discomfort as a way to train their awareness, discipline, and resilience.

We should voluntarily set aside a few days to subsist with little food, coarse clothing & no material comforts. We should prepare for adversity, amidst the favours of fortune. Such practices of endurance will help us realise we can make do with very little. Vagaries of fortune won’t affect us.

– Seneca, Letters From a Stoic

In this way, seeking out some discomfort in our daily lives can strengthen us for when unplanned challenges come our way. We become more resilient and able to deal with hardship. I’ve learnt these past months, that I don’t need all the luxury that I used to have to feel content in life.

One thing that has helped me push through the difficult moments is something I’ve learnt from the Vipassana meditation courses. My biggest lesson from practising Vipassana meditation is not to get attached to negative thinking or thought spirals. You know it will pass again, so you can interrupt that negative thinking pattern and endure discomfort.

How can you embrace discomfort?

You could live off the grid with only enough electricity to keep your lights on and a malfunctioning shower that surprises you with cold water every now and then—that’s one way to choose intentional discomfort.

Or, you could do it in a myriad of other ways, like intermittent fasting, cold showers, public speaking, waking up at 5am or pushing yourself with a hard physical workout. The choice is yours. But I would encourage you to think about how to do one hard thing each day and train your mind.

Let me know in the comments what’s one hard thing you’ll be doing today?

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Want to keep reading? Here are a few other articles I wrote:

3 Surprising Challenges of Living an Off-Grid Lifestyle

Confessions of a Recovering People Pleaser

Here´s how (and why) I turned off my internet!

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Something that inspired me this week:

Mark Manson, the author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, recently started a podcast. I love his no-nonsense approach to life, and he brings this to his podcast as well.

For this one, he interviewed Dean Stott, former Special Forces soldier. It’s an interesting watch (or listen). I specifically liked the part where they talked about choosing the challenging pathway. As you will have learnt from reading the above, I have a similar tendency.

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This is what you can expect from me every week! A long-form article related to a reflection or life lesson on personal growth and one thing that inspired me this week. If you liked this, don’t keep it to yourself; share it with your friends:

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